Thursday Thirteen

1. The VETS called my Person and said that all of Sophie's test results came back normal which I guess means that she passed, but I don't think it means she gets to grajooyate from anything, just that she probably doesn't have pankreea-tytus. The VETS said they are still not exactly sure what was wrong with my sister, but that she MIGHT still have pankreea-tytus, or maybe she just had a virus, or maybe her bowels are irritable. I have never talked to Sophie's bowels so I can't tell you if they are cranky, but they sure do stink sometimes. Anyways the VETS said my Person should just keep feeding Sophie her new foods and monitor her poops. I did not offer to help.


Beware of the back end, innernets.

2. Sophie is now eating different foods than me. She likes the new foods okay but not as much as she likes my foods, so she eats them slower. Because of this I eat my foods in the human litterbox room. (It is very undignified to eat in there, but I have to go where my Person puts the foods.) I am a big dude so I eat really fast and then I mraw mraw and paw at the door because I KNOW that Sophie's foods are out there and she hasn't finished them and if you SNOOZE YOU LOSE, KID, LET ME AT THOSE FOODS, but my Person never lets me out to eat them because she does not understand the rules of eating the foods.

3. This annoys me but so far I have not peed on anything even once about it.

4. But when my Person got back from visiting potenshul new friend Jahb, I did try to pee in her suitcase. Twice. But she caught me. Twice. She still has not unpacked the suitcase, but to keep me from peeing in it she just makes sure to keep it closed.

5. So now I sleep on it instead. HAHA PERSON!



6. My Person is talking to someone else who knows potenshul friend Jahb tomorrow morning and she said she hopes that Jahb will decide if he wants to be friends with her soon after that. I hope he decides soon and that he decides yes, because the friend Jahb my Person hangs out with now takes up way too much of her time.

7. By the time she gets home I have so much stuff to tell her that I just follow her around and mraw mraw for hours and it takes away from the other manly stuff that I need to be doing, like cleaning my whisker humps and prowling for hidden foods and watching the cat TV and ignoring that rabbit that lives here.


He doesn't help with the patrols or ANYTHING.

8. When we lived in Virjinya my Person's friend Jahb only took SOME of her time and I only had to mraw mraw at her about stuff for a little while before she was all caught up. It was a much better balance and my life was not quite so HARD then.

9. Sadie was wondering if I still wear shirts. (How YOU doin', Sadie?) All of my mancat shirts are in a place called Storij. Most of my Person's stuff is there since we had to move back to Whiskonsin so suddenly. HOPEFULLY if potenshul new friend Jahb decides he wants to be friends with my Person, she can go to Storij and get her stuff (and MY shirts). But for now, I am nude all the time. Drink it in, laydeez.



10. Right now the partment we are living in is in a big huge building of lots of partments so I have not had a chance to run Out There. But sometimes when my Person comes in the partment I TAKE OFF into the hallway! It is a very long hallway and I just trot down it, mraw mrawing the whole time so that any persons I pass know who I am and that I am a big dude who lives by them, just in case they didn't know. I never get too far before my Person comes out and scoops me up and says, "Where do you think you are going?" And I am all, "Down the hall, Person," which I think is pretty obvious, innernets, espeshully since she SAW ME GOING DOWN THERE, but my Person does not understand these things.

11. I have not gone into the hallway lately because the HOTS are here. I hate the HOTS. My Person has kept it nice and cool in the partment for us, so I am not going into that hallway no way no how, except if my Person left the door open I would HAVE TO even though the HOTS are out there, just because exploring is a manly thing to do so I would have no choice.

12. Obveeissly, those types of responsibilities come with being a man cat. It is hard to be me.


Thinking about my hardships.

13. I am glad that so many of my friends are still blogging and that so many people still remember me (not that I REALLY thought you would forget me, but who knows?). It is good to be back, innernets!

Man Cat Monday

But first a little update on my sister. After staying at the VETS while my Person was gone meeting potenshul new friend Jahb, Sophie is back home and doing fine. She is still not 100 percent herself, but she is a LOT more herself than she was last week, which means I have hissed and growled at her some because she has started bugging me again. My Person considers this a good sign, but I think it is mostly just annoying. We are both eating the foods and pooping. The VETS is sending Sophie's test out today and we may not get her scores until next week which is like A YEAR, so for now we are just hanging out and waiting. But for now things are good!

My Person said she liked potenshul new friend Jahb, but she has to talk to some more people who know him. But the other people who know him that she already talked to said that things look good and we should hear about that by the end of this week.

ANYWAY, ON TO THE IMPORTANT STUFF, NAMELY ME.

If you are new to my blog you may not know this, but I am the original man cat and I invented Man Cat Monday. I thought it would be a good way for man cats around the innernets to be manly, and also to get pointers from me on how to be a big man cat. So if you are participating in Man Cat Monday today, leave me a comment and let me know so I can come check you out.

Here is me for Man Cat Monday:


Watching the cat TV. Note how I totally ignore my Person and the camera. That is because I am too busy watching the cat TV to pay any attention to her. This is very manly.


Exploring the 'partment. I always look around for foods or other cats or vishus things that could get me or my Person. This is obviously very manly.


Showing off my ear hair and my whisker humps. Both manly.

Happy man cat Monday, innernets! I hope your day is manly. Let me know if you are participating!

My bachelor weekend

My Person is leaving today to meet her potenshul new friend Jahb, and she is taking Mac the mancat computer with her, so I won't be able to blog while she is gone (did she ask me if this was okay? No. No she did not). Sophie is going to the VETS while my Person is gone and Henry, the rabbit we live with, is at bunny camp, so I have the whole 'partment to myself. I can't decide what I will do. Maybe open a cigar bar or have some ladies over.


Decisions are exhausting.

Anyway, I wanted to let all of you know that my sister ate all of her foods while she was home AND she pooped! She did not each much breakfast yesterday, but my Person figured out a little later that it's because Sophie does NOT like cold foods. (I tried to explain that FOODS IS FOODS, KID, but she did not care.)

While she is at the VETS they will give her a lot of digestive tests, and just between you and me, innernets, I don't know how that's going to go, because I don't know how smart Sophie's digestives are. One of those tests is supposed to tell us if she has pancreeya-tytus, so we should know by the time my Person gets back! So if you could keep the purrs coming that would be great.

Let me know if anyone wants to come over while my Person is gone. I have two litterboxes all to myself and a big bed to sleep on and a whole WALL of cat TVs! Otherwise I will talk to you in a few days, innernets!

My sister is home!

Honestly innernets, my sister coming home was not a very huge deal. We did not have a big EMOSHUNAL reunion. My Person brought her in in the carrier and opened the door, and Sophie came RUNNING out! She did some laps around the room because she was so excited to be home, and then she settled on the bed and gave herself a long bath which was good because you have to get that VETS stink off of you as soon as you can. And then she slept for awhile! And then we had dinner, and my sister ate all of her foods, and both of us made sure to eat really slowly to really freak out my Person. And then we went to bed. The whole thing was no big deal, but you could tell my Person was real happy and thought it was a real big deal.


Sophie on her pillow.

This morning, though, my sister did not eat hardly any foods for breakfast. So my Person is worried again. She called the VETS and the VETS said that she wasn't concerned yet, because my sister got fed a lot of foods yesterday and might still just be adjusting to being at home. My Person has some medicine that makes cats hungry, and the VETS said to give Sophie some of that tonight and see if she will eat then, so that is the plan. My sister is going back to the VETS tomorrow anyway when my Person goes to meet her maybe-new-friend Jahb in another city, so either way the VETS will probably figure out what is going on and hopefully fix it. PLEASE keep purring that my sister keeps eating on her own! And also pooping, she hasn't pooped since she's been here. At least I don't think so. I don't really follow her around to check her litterboxing, innernets. I have other stuff to do.

Also, I clearly have not taught my sister very well how to deal with the VETS, because her VETS report card said this on it:

"Sophie has been a great patient. This morning she was very animated - rubbing, rolling and generally being very engaging which is probably normal behavior for Sophie when she is feeling well."

SIGH. You are not supposed to spend time making friends with the VETS, what you are SUPPOSED to do is ATTACK FIRST, ASK QUESTIONS LATER. You should HEAR the noises I make at the VETS, innernets. A few months ago my Person took me in there because I was peeing on the rug (haHA!) and by the time I was done with them, the VETS knew not to mess with the big man cat. First I made this face:



Then they took me into another room to try to pull out some of my pees with a needle. And my Person said later that even through THREE SETS of closed doors, she could hear me yelling at them. Eventually the VETS told my Person they were going to have to sedate me in order to get the pees. HAHA! At that same visit my Person saw that in my file it said, "Be careful - this patient is AGGRESSIVE!!!" And my Person said that when she and Sophie left the VETS yesterday, the VETS said, "Your cats are so sweet!....Well, Sophie, anyway." VICTORY. My Person always tells them, "I'm sorry, I wish you could meet him at home! He is a nice cat!" I wish she would cut that out because I don't want those VETS coming over here, no way no how.

Keep the purrs coming, innernets! We do NOT want Sophie to have to have more expensive testing or an operayshun. We just want her to get well, NOW!

Sophie update, part 2

We just heard from the VETS and my sister Sophie has not vommed ALL DAY LONG!

The VETS said they have forcefed her three times and are going to feed her once more before they leave for the night. She said Sophie has not thrown ANYTHING up, which is good news because, innernets, when Sophie was home this weekend, she spent a LOT of time blowing chunks. I am a dude who enjoys blowing chunks, so you must know that if I think she was overdoing it, she definitely was. And I am a neat chunk-blower; it's all in one spot. Sophie is not used to blowing chunks so it was just EVERYWHERE. I will spare you any more details. So far, Sophie has kept foods down for 8.5 hours!!

The VETS said they are still not sure what is wrong with Sophie but that she seems to be moving in the right direction and now what we really want is for her to poop. I think maybe if they knew how stinky Sophie's poops were they would not want that so much, but that is just my opinion.

We are definitely still not out of the woods and Sophie is NOT back to normal. She will stay at the VETS another night getting more water in an IV, and they will feed her more tomorrow. My Person has decided not to go visit her because we do not want to get her excited and then have her be sad when my Person leaves again. I always really liked it when my Person visited me at the VETS when my heart first broked, but then I have a LOT OF RAGE when I am at the VETS so having my Person there was good because it made me remember that I do not really hate all persons, JUST VETS. But Sophie is very different than me and since she seems to be doing okay, we do not want to risk messing that up.

PLEASE keep purring for my sister! There is still a chance she could need surgery and we DON'T WANT THAT, so keep the purrs coming!!!!!

KISMET OUT. Also VETS if you are reading this, feel free to send any foods that my sister does not eat my way and I will take care of them for you. But don't come near me when you deliver the foods because I hate you.

Sophie update

My sister Sophie spent all last night at the VETS getting water in an IV. I don't know what that means, but it sounds dumb because you can just drink water if you are thirsty. The VETS called my Person this morning and said Sophie did well overnight but is still not eating any foods (also dumb, give me the foods), so they are going to force-feed her and if she can't keep any food down still they are recommending something called a bare-e-um X-ray. I guess they feed Sophie some bare-e-um and then take a bunch of X-rays to see how it looks inside her insides, and that will tell them if there is something stuck in there. And if it shows that, they will probably recommend surgery.

My Person is driving me nuts, basically. She is panicky and stressed and a wreck, because all of this stuff is apparently going to cost around 2,000 moneys, which we just don't have. So she is not sure what to do.

Some persons have donated moneys and we want to say THANK YOU so much and that it helps, and that we appreciate it more than we can say. My Person also wants me to say that we are not posting about this so any of you will feel bad and give us moneys. The moneys are wonderful and they help us a lot, but I am just here blogging because that's what my blog is for, and my Person is hovering because she knows that all of you will understand how she is feeling.

I will keep you posted when we hear from the VETS again. (I hate the VETS.)

my sister Sophie

I know I have been very bad at blogging, but I am blogging today to let everyone know that my sister Sophie is very sick. She has been in and out of the VETS for the past few days and it seems that she might have an intestinuhl blockage, which I guess means that she ate something she should not have eaten and it is stuck in her insides.

She is going back to the VETS today and my Person does not know what will happen. We are living in Whiskonsin right now, because my Person left her friend Jahb in Virjinya to move with us to Californyuh to live with this man person that we all liked, but we were not in Californyuh very long before that man person decided he didn't want us living there, so we had to come all the way back to Whiskonsin, where my Person is from. My Person has a new friend Jahb here, but she is only friends with him on a free-lanse basis so we do not have hardly any moneys. And in addishun to Sophie being sick and at the VETS a lot this week, I had to spend a night camping in the oxyjin tent this week on account of my broked heart. The VETS told my Person that Sophie will probably need a lot more X-rays and maybe an operayshun if there is something stuck in her insides, and we are just not sure what will happen.

My Person is very, very, very, very sad and feels like a failure because she does not have moneys to do whatever is necessary to help Sophie. So if you could purr for all of us, I would really appreciate it.



My sister bugs me sometimes a lot, but she is a very good cat.

PSSST

Pssssst....innernets!!





REMEMBER ME????

I am going to do a Thursday 13 to explain why I have not been blogging FOREVER.

1. Mac, the mancat compyooter, went dead for awhile. He seems to be ok now. But he was dead!
2. My Person had to go see Mr. Nooz Byurow every day for a long time and she would turn Mac, the mancat compyooter, off when she left. But I think she had a fight with Mr. Nooz Byurow, because she is not going to see him anymore!
3. Mr. Nooz Byurow + Brad Skool = GRUMPY PERSON
4. I have spent LOTS of time trying to figure out ways to get out of the partment to Out There. So far this has not really worked. My ideas have inkloodid: digging through the cat TV, scratching at the door with my big man paws, running out the door whenever it is opened which gets me in Big Trouble, making very sad mraw mraw noises at the door. Since none of these have really WORKED, I am spending lots of time trying NEW things, which are also not working. Getting Out There is very hard.
5. We went to the VETS, and if you have been reading my blog for awhile, you know that this makes me VERY GROUCHY AND I MRAW MRAW AND HISS AND SOMETIMES BAT AT MY PERSON'S FACE AND EYEBALLS, WHICH IS NOT VERY NICE BUT WHAT DID YOU EXPECT TO HAPPEN, PERSON, AND EVEN THOUGH THIS VETS WAS DIFFERENT THAN THE ONE IN BROOKLYN THEY STILL BROUGHT OUT THE HAWK GLOVES FOR ME. THAT'S RIGHT, VETS!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!! Also Sophie gets very scared when we go to the VETS and it makes her go poop in the carrier THAT I HAVE TO SHARE WITH HER. AND IT SMELLS. AND STICKS TO ME. This made me grouchy enough that I did not want to talk to anyone. Not even you, innernets. I am sorry.
6. It is starting to get HOTS. This ALSO makes me grouchy.
7. In Brooklyn, one of my favorite places to sleep was on the people TV on top of the cable box. In Merruhlind, we don't HAVE a big cable box. This ALSO makes me grouchy.
8. We are on some sort of weird foods schedule. This ALSO makes me grouchy.
9. Sophie STILL wants to play ALL THE TIME. THIS ALSO MAKES ME GROUCHY. I AM TRYING TO CLEAN MY TOES SOMETIMES.
10. I think those are maybe all of the things that made me grouchy lately. I have also been busy threatening the many wild cats that come onto our cat TV. There is a orange cat that my Person calls Sammy. He is ALMOST BIGGER THAN ME, and he comes on the cat TV every night, and I sit and mraw mraw at him. There is another orange cat too. This cat never had a ballsectomy, so my Person just calls him ballscat. Ballscat is not bigger than me, but he does have balls. So I mraw mraw EXTRA at him.
11. None of the cats on the cat TV are lady cats. This ALSO makes me grouchy.
12. Sophie has been having hairballs all over the place. My Person gives her hairball stuff to make this better. The hairball stuff smells like toona, so I get excited when it comes out and I try to eat it, but it just sticks to my whiskers and then I have to clean it and that ALSO MAKES ME GROUCHY.
13. What can I say, innernets? I'm a busy dude.

But, now that Brad Skool is almost done (I guess that means he is going to go dead), I will have more time to blog. This makes me NOT grouchy! So if any of my friends from the innernets are still checking up on me, I should be around more often.

Here is a bonus picture of my furchin for my lady friends:



I'm sure Sophie will be around too. (SIGH)

Seven Strange Things on Sunday

My really great friends Rosie and Cheeto tagged me and Sophie to do the "seven weird things about me" survey. I was GOING to split it, like they did, but instead Sophie and I are each going to list our OWN 7 things, because after all, it is MY blog and so I think I should get 7 all by myself.

OKAY. KISMET:
1. I like to make blanket forts. There is a VERY specific process to this, though. First, my Person has to be laying under the blankets. Then, there has to be a little cave opening in the blanket NATURALLY - NOT one made by my Person. Then, I walk in, and dig with my big man paws, and make sure the blanket fort is strukchurally sound, and if all of that meets with my approval, ONLY THEN will I lay down. You can't just hang out in any blanket, you know.

2. When I get very hungry and grouchy, I push the water dish with my nose so it spills over the sides and the dish makes a great clanky sound on the floor. My Person does not like this.

3. When my Person comes home at night I sit by the door and mraw mraw mraw REAL loud and scratch with my big man paws so she knows I am still inside and that I am waiting for my foods. I think she forgets this stuff sometimes, so I am just trying to remind her.

4. I knock stuff off of EVERYTHING - tables, desks, bookshelves, dressers, chairs, the persons teevee. Your stuff is not safe ANYWHERE, Person! HAHA! It is for your own safety that I do it. Your stuff could be vishus without you knowing!

5. I have to hump sometimes. I only hump my Person, and only her arm or shoulder, and only when she is under a blanket. After I am done humping, I always take a bath and I don't look at my Person right away because I am a little embarrassed.

6. I usually get locked out of my Person's room in the morning because I get HUNGRY and I want my FOODS and so I make noise. And then later on, when my Person doesn't get up right away, I get worried that maybe she is not in there anymore, and has left without giving me my FOODS, or that something vishus that I didn't notice got her, and then I might NEVER get my FOODS, so I scratch at the door with my man paws and I mraw mraw a LOT. Eventually my Person will say "Kis-MET!" and then, because I know she is in there and alive, I stop.

7. I have a LOT of dreems, and when I am dreeming, my big whisker humps twitch and so do my man paws and my back legs, and sometimes I mraw mraw or lick my lips in my sleep. My Person says "Get him Kizzy!" to me while I sleep, just in case I am dreaming of chasing some other big man cats. This shows that she understands that I am a big dude and I could chase down any other big dude, if I wanted to. I think that is nice of her!



HI! I ARE SOPHIE! I ARE VARY ACITED to tell yoo some WEERD things about ME!!!!

1. I LOVE TO EAT FOODS! ANY kind of foods, I will eat them all!! The nyce laydee says I must have been a dawg in a past lyfe. CAN YOO IMAGINE ME, SOPHIE, AS A DAWG??? Some of the foods I lyke to eat are: peetsuh, ryce kayks, cookees, peenut butter, any kind of CHEEZ, ryce, potaytohs, and krakers. I LOVE FOODS!!!

2. Since I moved in with the nyce laydee and my bruther Kismet, I have learned to be a VARY kleen kitty and to kleen my furs and my TOES and my TAYL many times thru owt the day. (I was vary stinky beefor my bruther tawt me to be kleen!) And when I kleen myself, I suck on my furs and I make snorty sownds. The nyce laydee calls it my snorgling. It can be VARY lowd!!

3. When I yawn, I make a hacking sownd that sometimes ascayres the nyce laydee!!

4. One of my whiskers on top of my head is black. Just one!!!!

5. I have 2 black polka dots on one of my eers!!! The nyce laydee sayz they are my fashun axsessorees!!! This meens I am VARY fashunable, even when I am NOOD!!!!

6. I LOVE MY BRUTHER AND THE NYCE LAYDEE A LOT, but I love my bruther MOST of all. I go EVARYWHERE he goes. If we are in a room with the nyce laydee and my bruther leaves, I go with! If we are in bed with the nyce laydee and my bruther leaves, I GO WITH! If my bruther is watching the cat teevee, or poopsing, or knocking things off the dresser, I GO WITH!

My bruther does not always LYKE that, but I CAN'T HELP IT! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! Plus he is VARY fassinayting.

7. Whenever anyone reeches down to pet me - becuz I are VARY small, yoo know - I stand up on my tippy toes and DIVE into their hand!! I get VARY good pets this way.

I, Kismet, also wanted to say in response to questions on my last post: Sophie NEVER cleans my Spot 13. That is man cat only territory. However, I have cleaned hers before, because it is STINKY AND NEEDS TO BE CLEANED.

I hope you liked our strange things!

Man Cat Monday

Sup innernets. I wanted to post a HAPPY NEW YEAR blog and a KRISMISS blog but my Person LEFT US ALONE FOREVER AND EVER. It was not SO bad because some lady came and gave us the foods and cleaned our poops (cleaned them much better than my Person does, too), but I get VERY GRUMPY when my Person leaves me alone with Sophie for a LONG TIME.

Anyway, since I haven't been able to blog FOREVER, I didn't even get to tell you what my new year's rezolooshins are. I did not make too many because I think I am pretty good at being my man cat self, but I did make two. The first one is to blog more. This is not really under my control because my Person controls Mack, the man cat computer, but I am going to try anyway. And my second rezolooshin is to be an even better man cat than I have been.

Which explains this picture:



Normally I do not like to be this close to Sophie, but while my Person was gone we had a LOT of time together, and while she is still VERY ANNOYING most of the time - like I don't want to play all the time, I have THINGS to do, like clean my toes and do my patrols and knock things off the dresser - it is nice of her to give me a bath. And I think a good man cat - one who might be tired from doing all his man cat stuff, for example - would just take the bath and try to enjoy it. So I did!

I hope all of my blogging friends had good new yearses and Krissmisses. I am also going to try to comment on other blogs more TOO. The year of Kismet!

MY ONE YEER!!!!

HI!!!! I are Sophie!!! I are VARY acited today because TODAY, I have been living with my bruther Kismet and the nyce laydee for ONE YEER!!!! I think that meens that I git to stay here forEVER and that I never have to go back owtsyd on Rohd Aylind!!!!!! And this mayks me VARY happy because I LOVE MY BRUTHER AND THE NYCE LAYDEE!!!!

I think that I have changed a LOT since I came to live with my bruther and the nyce laydee. I have lerned some VARY aportant things, like how to kleen myself, and that it is aportant to keep my booty hairs trimmed so that my poops don't get stuck to them, because then maybe the nyce laydee would not want to PET my booty, and I LOVE to have my booty petted!!! I have also diskuvvered some VARY DELISHUS FOODS!!!! like peetsuh krust and ranch dressing and cheez and pasketti sauce!!! But most aportantly, I have learned that it is VARY good not to live owtsyd!!!!

I thought it would be aciting to look at pikchurs and see how much I have changed now that I am a INDOOR CAT!!!

The nyce laydee says this pikchur is my first foto op. As yoo can see, I were VARY small. I look sad because it was cold and there was no FOODS!!!!



Here is another pikchur of me in Rohd Aylind. I am under a big masheen. This is the pikchur that made the nyce laydee think I should come live here!!



And here I are now!!!!!!!!



I am much kleener and I have also gayned ONE WHOLE POWND! And I have vary stinky poops.

I am vary glad to be a indoor cat. Thank yoo evarywun for being my frends!!!!!

I know that my bruther has not blogged in a vary long time, and I hope no one is mad that I am blogging before him. He will blog soon!!!!!

Fashun Show Friday!!!

HI!!! I ARE SOPHIE!!!! I are here to do a FASHUN SHOW FRIDAY post!!! I have been meening to post pikchurs of me in my byootiful sun dress for a VARY long tyme, but the nyce laydee has not been aybul to help me until now. I can blog all by myself but I need her to do the pikchurs. She is VARY bizzy, so I am glad she is helping me now!!!!

The nyce laydee bought me my sun dress to ware during the summer. It is vary light and summery!!!!

Here I are relacksing in my dress. As yoo can see it makes my VARY happy to ware it!!!!!


I lyke my sun dress becuz it matches my socks, and I think it looks vary nyce with my ornj furs!!!

Here I are from the side:

The straps are vary dayntee which is nyce becuz I are VARY small!!!!!

When I am waring my sun dress, I lyke to sit in the sun!!!!


Also, today is the birfday of the scayree laydee who loves me a LOT who yoost to live with us. She is vary scayree becuz she gets VARY acited when she sees me, and she lykes to touch my feets. But she is also VARY nyce, so I wunted to say happy birfday!!!! And here is a pikchur of me and one of my feets. But pleez do not try to touch it!!!!!


I hope yoo all lyke my sun dress and the pikchur of me and my feets!!!!! My sun dress makes me feel VARY pretty.

Thank yoo Kismet for letting me blog!!!!!!!

My Big Advenchur

Innernets, I have not been able to blog lately, because my Person is so busy using the compyooter to do things for Brad Skool, and then when she was done with Brad Skool for 4 days I thought I would FINALLY get the compyooter back, but then she crashed her moovable masheen and had to use the compyooter to figure out how to get the moovable masheen to be not sick anymore, and she was REAL upset so I had to be on man cat alert, and then I was all set to blog YESTERDAY, when I GOT LOCKED OUT OF THE PARTMENT.

We live close to the ground now - in Brooklyn we lived high up - so now when persons open the door sometimes I run Out There. I do not ever go very far. I just like to eats the grass and explore in the backyard. And my Person sometimes just follows me around to make sure that I do not leave to pick up the laydees or find my chiwahwah gang, and it is fine. But YESTERDAY, my Person was taking the moovable masheen to the doctor, and when the door opened, it was a big smelly man.

Now, since I am a big dude living with all GIRLS, normally I am very excited to have other mans around. Like my friend Ted who took me outside on my leash, or that person who used to live with my Person's boyfrend Joe, who told me many times that he thought I was a bobcat. But THIS guy was not even interested in me at all, and when he opened the door and I ran outside, he just LET ME GO.

At first I thought this was so great. Because I got to get away from Sophie for awhile, and eat lots of grass and explore and make sure that there was nothing vishus Out There waiting to eat my foods or attack my Person. And also to see if there are other foods hiding Out There, or maybe other cats, because there could be. You never know.

But eventually, I started to get kind of HOTS. I don't know if you remember, innernets, but I DO NOT SO MUCH LIKE THE HOTS, and I am a big guy, and I am kind of hairy, and I was outside for MANY HOWRS, and it just got VERY HOTS.

So when my Person came back in a DIFFERENT moovable masheen, she got owt and I ran over and mraw mraw mraw'd. And she said, "what are you doing out here??" And then she got REAL MAD. Not at me, because I am her big guy, but at that big smelly man, who I guess was there to fix some stuff in the partment, which is just dumb, because I AM A BIG MAN AND I CAN FIX THESE THINGS. So she scooped me up and gave me lots of smooches and called me a very good boy for not running away - as if I would leave the place where the FOODS is - and took me back inside. And I found the coolest place in the whole partment to lay down and recover from my big advenchur.

Which is in the front closet.

Anyway, while I was getting cool, my Person got BACK on the compyooter and there was a email from the man who owns the partment. And he said that the reepareman had let me out and tried to find me but he couldn't, and that he hoped I would come back home. And that was it. MY PERSON WAS REAL MAD AT HIM!!!!! But she couldn't say anything to him because he owns the partment.

So, she gave me lots of treats instead.

Then Sophie started to get scared that I was not really ME but just another stray cat who LOOKS like me. And I didn't want my Person to think that too so I made sure to do lots of Kismet moves last night, like throwing lots of things off of the tables and mrawing REAL LOUD to get fed REAL EARLY in the morning. And growling at Sophie. I think Sophie is still scared - she is usually scared of SOMETHING - but I am pretty sure that my Person knows that I am me, because she told me my feets are real big a few times already today.

Anyway, the moral of the story is to not trust the big smelly men in your partments. And be careful of the HOTS! And never forget where your foods lives.

Man Cat Monday

It's DEFINITELY Monday.

I was saving this post for Man Cat Monday, and while I waited TONS of cats posted pictures of them wearing their own ties! We are all heading off to the office today.


I am challenging authority by wearing mine to the side. I am also going to give MOST of my paperwork to Sophie.

MY VARY FIRST FASHUN SHOW FRIDAY!!!

HI! I ARE SOPHIE! This has ben a VARY bizzy week, becuz the big DAWG was heer for a long long tyme. But the big dawg is gone now, and I are VARY happy abowt that, becuz it means that I can sit on the kowch again and eat my foods!!!!! I do lyke to hang owt in the laydee's room, but it is nyce to be able to come owt too!!!!! I are VARY excited to be blogging today becuz I are doing my VARY FIRST fashun show Friday!!!!!!! The nyce laydee got me a VARY BYOOTIFUL shert. I think it is maybe even something that my hero Daisy would wear!!!! I HOPE SO. I want to be just lyke Daisy when I grow up!!! Heer I are in my shert: As yoo can see it has BYOOTIFUL ruffles on the sleeves!!!! And the ruffles have FLOWERS on them!!!!!! Heer is what it luks lyke from the frunt: The BEST PART is the back!!!! The shert has vary ladylyke buttins and some more flowers: The flowers match my ornj fur, and the ruffles match my socks!!!!
I think my shert is vary byootiful!!! It makes me feel VARY pretty. Do yoo lyke it???

I ARE HELPFUL!

HI! I ARE SOPHIE! I was going to try to do a werdless Wensday post but I can't acuz I have stuff to SAY!!!


This pikchur is of my tayl! I are helping the nyce laydee reed the newspaypur!!! I do not reed the newspaypur but I do lyk to EET IT!!!! It are VARY delishus!!!! I think the nyce laydee REELY appreesheeayts my help!!

Thank yoo Kismet for letting me blog today!!!!!

PRESENTS!

I got a package from Jake and Bathsheba yesterday night!!!!!!!!! I was VERY excited, but there is a process to opening packages. You can't just RIP INTO them. That would be very undignified.
First, you have to sniff. This is the only way to tell if there are suspishus things inside, like other cats, or GREAT things, like FOODS! After you make sure that there is nothing scary or nothing that you don't want to share, you can let other cats in your house, like little orange sisters, sniff it too. Even though it is YOUR present, and not hers. Because maybe you are just REALLY NICE like that. After the sniffing is done, you might want to just get comfortable on the present. Sometimes, the best part of the present is the box itself! (You can also see my big whisker humps and my very long whiskers here.) And always remember to make sure to remind everyone that the present is FOR YOU AND NOT THEM. Anyway, after all of that, you can open the box! Inside mine was a Drinkwell Fountain to help with me pee problems, and Bathsheba even signed it on the bottom! (She can do that because she has so many extra toes) There was also a bag of TEMTAYSHUNS!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE Temtayshuns. I was able to get them out of the box before Sophie saw them, too, but my Person says I have to share with her anyway. I don't think I should have to, though, because Sophie really wanted to play in the box my presents came in, so I let her have it.


She likes to eat newspaypurs and chew on weird things, and there was lots of newspaypurs in the box, so it was a great size - and snack! - for a Sophie! THANK YOU, JAKE AND BATHSHEBA!!!!!

ADVENCHURS!

I AM KISMET. I AM BACK. THIS IS MY BLOG.

I have been letting my sister Sophie use my blog a lot lately, and I will let her use it in the future too, even though I don't really LIKE TO, but I am NICE, and sometimes my Person says "Kismet be NICE", but for now I am blogging on MY BLOG!

I wanted to write about the great advenchurs I have been having in Merruhlind. I was worried about moving here because our partment in Brooklyn had a GREAT jungle outside, and I didn't know anything about Merruhlind before we got here except that I knew there was no eff trayn, but let me tell you, the jungle here is BIGGER!

PLUS we live ON THE GROWND now, so whenever my Person opens the door to leave, I just RUN RIGHT OUTSIDE and INTO THE JUNGLE! And my Person does not like this, and she grabs me and carries me back inside over her shoulder, and I don't LIKE THAT, and I GROWL, and sometimes I will use my very big front feets to grab onto things so that she can't take me inside that easily, and when I do that she says I am just like a toddler, and I don't know what that means, but it is probably something real big and VISHUS like ME!

Anyway, last weekend my friend Ted came to visit, and he took me outside LOTS! Here I am with Ted:
My Person said "Just make sure he stays on his leesh!" but Ted understands being a big man cat in the jungle, so he let me off my leesh to do some exploring and patrolling. There were many dogs yapping at me from the fenced-in jungle behind the partment, but I was not scared of them. I just kept on exploring. If you are in the jungle, it is important to keep focused like that at all times!
When my Person won't take me out into the jungle, which is A LOT, I watch the cat teevee with Sophie. Sophie does not like to go outside, probably because she used to LIVE outside, which I think would be GREAT, except that you would not get the foods from my Person, and I like the foods from my Person.

My Person is done with her first mester of Brad Skool, so the person that used to live with my Person is coming to see us today! I am hoping that she brings presents, and that she will remember how big I am and that I like to be told how big I am. She was always good at this, so I think she will remember. Sophie is very scared of her.

And because my sister is formerly feral, and it's Friday, here is a pic of her too. I AM NICE. Plus, this picture really deminstrayts her feralness. She likes to dig in the garbage for foods, and to lick the foods cans after we eat the foods. It is very undignified.
AND, we got some awards lately - The Rockin' Boy Blogger (which I got from Jake and Speedy) and Rockin' Girl Blogger (which Sophie got from the lovely Bathsheba WHO HAS EXTRA TOES IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW) awards, and Sophie won the schmooze award from Fiona and Ali too! Thanks for nominating us, everybody!

I have been real bad about updating my friends' links, maybe because certain small orange cats keep TAKING MY BLOG, so if you read our blog and would like to be added to the links, please leave a comment and I PROMISE to add you. It is just hard to get the computer from my Person sometimes.

OH MY GOSH!!!!!

HI!!! I ARE SOPHIE!!!! I GOTTED TAGGED TO DO A SURVAY BY SKEEZIX HOO IS THE MOST FAMISSIST OF ALL THE CATS IN THE HOLE WERLD!!!!!! He is SUCH a selebritee, PLUS my HERO DAISY is his gerlfrend!! I ARE SO ACITED!!!!!!

But afore I can do the survay I haf to tell evarywun that this is my BRUTHER'S blog, and that I have just been YOOZING IT a lot laytlee, and that he is going to blog again SOON. Here are a pikchur of him so yoo know that I am not lying.

As yoo can see, he is still VARY big!!!! I luv my bruther!!!!

HEER IS THE SURVAY!!! I luv SKEEZIX!!!!

What were you doing 10 years ago?
I am VARY yung, so I was not alyv! But if I was, I was probablee a cat foods tayster becuz I LOVE the foods!!!!

What were you doing 1 year ago?
I was living outsyd in Rode Aylind!!!! I was also VARY VARY yung, even yunger than I am now!!! And I was living with my mom and my dad and my bruther, and thare was a meen man who did not lyk us!!!

Five snacks you enjoy:
I LOVE THE FOODS!! I will eet anything the nyce laydee lets me eet, lyk her food, or YORE food, but if I hadta pick theez would be my five:

1. TEMTAYSHUNS!!!! Sometimes when the nyce laydee gives my bruther and me the FOODS she forgets to close the door to the kabinit, and I steal the WHOLE BAG OF TEMTAYSHUNS, and I take it into my cat tent and chew on it until I can get it open and then my bruther and I eat the WHOLE THING!!!!
This is what I look lyk in my tent:

Yoo can tell it is me becuz my feets are white!!!!!
2. PEETZUH!! Peetzuh is VARY delishus. It has 2 vary delishus parts: the cheez, and the krust. I like to steal entire krusts in my mouth and run away with them, but they are vary hard to eat so this is only for profeshunuls!!!
3. Baked potaytoz!!! When the laydee eats theez, she puts sower kreem and cheez on them, so if I can get a good bite, thare are many delishus things ON TOP of the potayto itself, which is also delishus!!!
4. FRISKEEZ!!!! Friskeez always tastes better from my bruther's bowl. He does not mynd switching with me halfway throo the meel, either. HE IS THE BEST BRUTHER!!!
5. When I am VARY hungry, I chew on my tayl. It is not that taystee.

Five songs to which you know the lyrics:
I do not know the werds to any songs, BUT I sing a lot anyway! The laydee calls it my "cherping".

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:

1. Buy my bruther and the nyce laydee LOTS of presents!!
   
2. Buy myself a whole lot of FOODS!!! An entyre peetsuh, JUST FOR ME!!!
   
3. Get a WHOLE LOT OF KLOHZ and praktiss being just lyk DAISY!!!!
   
4. Pay to have the whole nayburhood fenced in so my bruther could go owtsyd as much as he wants! He gets VARY growchy when the nyce laydee does not let him go owt.
5. Mayk shur that EVARYWUN is as happy as ME!!!
   

Five bad habits:

1. I steel foods.
   
2. Sometimes, thare is poops on my booty.
   
3. I lyk to play ALL THE TIME and sometimes I attack my bruther's tayl to mayk him play with me.
   
4. The things on the nyce laydee's dresser are NOT toys. I have a hard tym remembering this.
   
5. I lyk to chew on fingers. Not vary hard, though!!!
   

Five things you like doing:

1. EATING THE FOODS!!!!
   
2. Having my booty petted!
   
3. Hanging owt with the nyce laydee
   
4. BLOGGING!!!!!!
5. Following my bruther arownd. He is VARY fassinayting.
   

Five things you would never wear again:

I do not reely have many klohz. I have a black tee-shirt that says S Katty Kat on it, becuz that is my rapper naym. And I have a pink polo shirt, but it is kinda big on me, becuz I am VARY small. I also have a white tee-shirt. I would ware all of them agenn!!!!! I would maybe not like to ware shooz on my feets, but that is all. I would also REELY LUV a pretty party dress, becuz I am a GERL!!!!

Five favourite toys:

1. My fuzzy wyte snohflayk ball
   
2. My bloo fether wand (I played with this so much I broked it)
   
3. My BRUTHER!!!!
   
4. The nyce LAYDEE!!!
5. The things on the nyce laydee's dresser are NOT TOYS.
   

I am asposed to tag FIVE OTHER CATS but I do not know too many other cats acuz I don't have my own BLOG! I will try though!!!!

I know that Skeezix already tagged her, but I HAFTA TAG DAISY becuz she is my HERO!!!!
And Dragonheart, acuz he does not have any hayrs and I bet not having to clean all of that fluff is VARY nyce!!!!
And Finn, acuz he told me I was pretty!!!!!
And TRIP acuz he seems acited all the time lyk me!!!!
And last but not leest, JAZPER acuz we lived on Rohd Aylind together!!!!!

I LUV MY BRUTHER AND EVARYWUN!!!!

Hi!! I are SOPHIE! I are yoozing my bruther's blog for SOPHIE SUNDAY!!!!!!! I know it is TEKNIKLEE Man Cat Monday, but I wunted to blog abowt ME, and I couldn't do it yesturday becuz the nice laydee had to use the compyooter to typ things for her frend Brad Skool, so my bruther sed I could blog today INSTED!!! MY BRUTHER IS THE BEST!!!! I am very acited!!!!

The nice laydee cut the furs on my butt!!!! I am VARY fluffy, and the hairs back there were VARY long and when I sit down they fan owt and sometimes poops would get stuck to them so the nice laydee trimmed them for me!!! Here is a pikchur:
As yoo can see I am still VARY fluffy, but now the hairs are shorter and they take less time to kleen, AND NOW I can sit in things like this:
without my butt hairs hanging out!!!! The nice laydee sed that this is a candul holder but I fit in it vary nyclee!!!!!
Here is a pikchur of me and my bruther watching the cat teevee!!!!
My tayl is in the pikchur, but it is not big becuz I am ascayred, it ALWAYS looks like that. I am VARY fluffy!! I lyk to watch the cat teevee with my bruther!!!
Here is a pikchur of my feets!!!
I am vary oranj, except for my toes and my tummy and my feets and my chest!! And my paw pads which are pink becuz I am a GIRL!!!!

I hope you lykt my blog!!! I like to eat the foods and kleen the hairs on my tummy and lay on top of the laydee!!!!