To the vets!

I never blogged about this, because the whole situation made me kind of MAD, but the other week I had to go to the VETS! I have not been to the vets since I have been with my Person, but I spent lots of time there before I came to live with her. When I was living in a cage at the pet store, the volunteer people took me there to have my ballectomy, and to get poked with sharp things WHICH I DO NOT LIKE BY THE WAY, and then I had to go there a bunch more times when I started having problems with my yurinerry trakt and my peeing. (That was all probably because they took away my balls. You can't mess too much with that area because then the pee gets mad and won't come out.)

Anyway, my Person says I HAVE to go to the vet once EVERY SINGLE YEAR even though I am peeing just fine now, and not even on the couch anymore, but then she said that maybe peeing on the bed is not a good way to show that I am fine with the peeing, and anyway so we went to the vets. I wore my gray sweatshirt and I got carried down the street in the plastic box that I was in when I first came to my Person's. It's a real big box, because I don't fit in the smaller ones. I made sure to mraw mraw a lot while we were walking there so that the persons we passed by would know I was in there in case they couldn't see me, and I also mraw'd while we were sitting in the waiting room, and my Person would stick her fingers through the box door and say "it's ok Kismet!" But I tend to not believe her when I am in the plastic box in strange places, AND THAT TURNED OUT TO BE RIGHT BECAUSE THINGS WERE ABOUT TO BE VERY VERY NOT OK.

When they took us into the examinayshun room, the vet lady dumped me out of the plastic box because I was not coming out by myself no way no how lady! To her credit, the vet lady did compliment my sweatshirt when I got dumped out of the box, but that didn't mean I was gonna be nice to her. There is a certain way that I like to be introduced to new persons - I like them to bend down, and give me their hand so I can give it a real good sniff, and then if they have a coat or a vest I like them to put that on the chair so I can dig inside it, and then I like to walk on their laps for awhile and continue to sniff. The vet lady did none of this. She just dumped me out of that box WITHOUT EVEN A SNIFF AT ALL and then my booty was on a very cold metal table. So I sat there and hissed real loud for a long time, and the vet lady kept saying "you have such great teeth pumpkin!" And she tried to touch me and I kept dodging her, and then she tried to hold me down to poke me with things, but I was HAVING NONE OF THAT, and I growled and hissed and she had to call in reinforcements because I'm so big and skwirmy. A real big dude came in and he HELD ME TO THE TABLE AND LET ME TELL YOU I JUST SCREAMED FOR ALL I WAS WORTH. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my Person covering her ears and her eyes. THAT IS HOW LOUD I WAS SCREAMING. I EVEN HURT HER EYES. And they poked me a lot with sharp things which as I mentioned I DONT LIKE VERY MUCH. And then FINALLY they brought the plastic box back and I went back inside it and hissed some more. And then my Person said, "do you have any treats for him?" because she knows I like the foods. And then they gave me some treats, but I did NOT EAT THOSE BECAUSE THEY COULD HAVE BEEN POISONED.

And then I got carried back down the street in the plastic box, and my Person let me out when we got back in the apartment, and I hid in the closet for awhile.

Then my Person cleaned my cat box and as soon as she did that I had to pee, you know, because as soon as the cat box is clean you always have to pee or poop right away, and when I was done peeing she took some of my pee in a plastic tube and took it away. And then a few days later she told me that my pee aytch is normal. I didn't know that my pee had an aytch, but I guess it's good that it's normal. And I don't know how long a year is, but it better be a long time, because I do not want to go back to the vet lady anytime soon.